The end. Such a final Phrase. the end. Such a mournful state. The end. The last goodbye. The end. For you i'll cry.
The end so emminent, so constantly looming. Six letters, two words, that can stop your world and make you want to never look back. In a world that is so temporary, a reality that is so transient, in a life that is so fragile, in a universe that is so shattered, our only untiy, our only constant is the end. We start every venture, some fail, some succeed, we try, we hope, but the only certainty is the end. We know not where our journeys may take us. Our fates so disparate may some day intertwine. Our lives may some day fuse. And then just like that, in one slow second, in one ridiculous moment we bid it all goodbye.
Our love once so strong is now a roadside wreck. Our hopes, so purely similar, are now dashed. My heart, so truly yours, is now thrashed. The end is near. The end is my only real fear. For now we drift in a cloudy sky, but surely very soon this will die. You ask me to say that I am not hurt. You want to know why i pretend. But the fact my love is that nothing really matters cause we've reached the end. The night is here. Not one star that I can wish upon. So I sleep, my tears drained like the starless sky.
But once agian I awake, because the end has ended and my sun brings a new beginning...
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Why?
we all look for love, yet in the midst of this quest we often put so many restrictions on the form we hope to find it in, that do we truly ever completely open ourselves up to the possibility of finding true love?
we run from those we fear will hurt us.
we shrink away from those committed.
we hide from those scarred.
we ignore those who do not fit our prototype.
we live our lives in search for something that is pure and true and yet we close ourselves off to the possibility of ever finding it.
we bargain for more.
we pray for more.
we wish and hope for more
yet at the end of it all, we settle for so much less.
the path of purity, the winding road of this journey never has and never will be easy.
along the way we get slapped in the face by concealed tree branches. we stumble over rocks, get an itchy case of the poison ivy, get stung by bees and bitten by wild animals. we get shat on by birds and step into some terribly unsavory situations. but the true horror, the only incurable accident is when we see that flower, that oh so alluring flower at the very edge of the cliff. we know we musn't, we fight the temptation, we resist the urge, we bury our desires but all invain. there is no running from the flower, there is no parachute, there is no harness, there are no safety nets-just us and the solid ground below.
and then we stand there for the slightest second, a momentary thought, a slight consideration, just one question-one word-why?
why?
for the embrace that envelopes you in its entirety.
for that kiss that never really leaves you're lips.
for a touch that is never too far away.
for that look that makes you feel complete.
for that whisper that echoes eternally.
for a giddy passion that is unnerving.
for that longing that is deliciously painful.
for that face that makes you smile.
for that voice that makes you're heart skip a beat.
for that lie that never dies.
for that truth that never actually lived.
our quest for love is incomprehensible.
is it merely a state of mind or is it rather a profound state of being?
is it the reality of our existence or the legacy of our absence?
is it the illusion created or the certainty that lies ahead?
is it an impersonation of falsehood or the cloak of the gospel?
is love finding that someone?
or is it the never ending search for an intangible design?
we run from those we fear will hurt us.
we shrink away from those committed.
we hide from those scarred.
we ignore those who do not fit our prototype.
we live our lives in search for something that is pure and true and yet we close ourselves off to the possibility of ever finding it.
we bargain for more.
we pray for more.
we wish and hope for more
yet at the end of it all, we settle for so much less.
the path of purity, the winding road of this journey never has and never will be easy.
along the way we get slapped in the face by concealed tree branches. we stumble over rocks, get an itchy case of the poison ivy, get stung by bees and bitten by wild animals. we get shat on by birds and step into some terribly unsavory situations. but the true horror, the only incurable accident is when we see that flower, that oh so alluring flower at the very edge of the cliff. we know we musn't, we fight the temptation, we resist the urge, we bury our desires but all invain. there is no running from the flower, there is no parachute, there is no harness, there are no safety nets-just us and the solid ground below.
and then we stand there for the slightest second, a momentary thought, a slight consideration, just one question-one word-why?
why?
for the embrace that envelopes you in its entirety.
for that kiss that never really leaves you're lips.
for a touch that is never too far away.
for that look that makes you feel complete.
for that whisper that echoes eternally.
for a giddy passion that is unnerving.
for that longing that is deliciously painful.
for that face that makes you smile.
for that voice that makes you're heart skip a beat.
for that lie that never dies.
for that truth that never actually lived.
our quest for love is incomprehensible.
is it merely a state of mind or is it rather a profound state of being?
is it the reality of our existence or the legacy of our absence?
is it the illusion created or the certainty that lies ahead?
is it an impersonation of falsehood or the cloak of the gospel?
is love finding that someone?
or is it the never ending search for an intangible design?
A view from my window
As the downpour came to a halt, the sun filtered through the thin grey. A rainbow adorned the recently gloomy sky, filling it with colour and joy. On the street below me people chattered away carelessly. Their talk was animated and excited, their gestures welcoming and gentle, and their smiles were endless. The smiles were as innocent as they were mischievous, filling the air with a certain aura of mischief. The incessant melody of sounds gently floated up to my window sill and soothed my excited mind.
The smell of the fresh food from the street vendors lingered in the air and aroused insatiable appetites. The food looked delicious. The various colors of the many sweets spread across the street seemed to reflect the happiness around them. The sun reflecting off the various glass ornaments filled the street with bursts of color. The street was exploding with life and excitement. Children ran wild, chasing after balloons and yearning for their chance to be lifted into the air by the massive giant wheel. Although, many people tried to contain their excitement and anticipation for the beautiful day that they were experiencing, they seldom succeeded. The multitudes of street vendors roared offers, trying to speak above each other to attract their customers. Every roar was filled with compassion, and every sale, regardless of whose it was, was met with pride and smiles from one and all. The bangles on their racks glistened with fresh rain drops and clattered in harmony as women and girls tried them on.
And as the sun began its slow decent beneath the horizon the crowds began to disperse, leaving behind memories of a day that would live on in their hearts forever. The street still buzzed with echoes of excited chatter and the appetizing smell of food still remained long after the people had left. As I got up to bolt my window shut, I pondered over what new adventure tomorrow had in store for me.
The rain fell in strong, heavy droplets and the sun hid behind the black clouds like a coward. The street below me was once again filled with people, just like it always is. Although the downpour soon came to an end all it brought was humid, hot weather. As people talked away incessantly their tones were angry and upset. They sounded as if life was not worth living, the everyday pains and troubles not worth enduring. Their dark clothes clung tightly to their skin as a result of the disastrous climate.
The smell of food floated up to my balcony and I coiled in revulsion. The food below was oily, greasy and unhygienic enough to kill the people below, yet they ate away not bothering about their lives. The colorful sweets were stale and covered with the white of decay. As parents complained and moaned about the horrible weather, the children ran wild. They cried and shrieked their protests when they learned that they were not to ride the giant wheel. The various glass ornaments lying around the vendors’ shops were chipped, scattering light in all directions and into the eyes of annoyed passersby. The ever present smiles of the people on the street below me were filled with malice and dripping with greed. To them the world was nothing more than a giant market where nothing was immoral in the pursuit of money and their own shallow happiness.
The street vendors bellowed above each other, trying to be heard. They were disheartened and discontented with their meaningless lives in one of a million bazaars in the city. Their eyes and heart were consumed with jealously at the success of a fellow vendor. Their beady eyes combed the people lined street looking for an innocent pedestrian to fall prey to their commercial trap. The bangles on the racks clanged and created loud and annoying sounds. As women and girls alike tried them on the one thought that consumed their minds was “can I possibly afford this?”
As the sun began its lazy fall behind the horizon the road emptied. It was void of any good memories and all that lingered in the air was the hatred that had floated around like the stink of the stale food. The vendors packed their belongings and counted their meager earnings for the day. They returned to their lives of compromise and nothingness and thought about another day in their own personal hell. And once the road was clear of all living beings, I got off my ledge, bolted my window shut, and thought of the true shallowness of monotony of everyday life that consumes us, and that will eventually destroy us all.
The smell of the fresh food from the street vendors lingered in the air and aroused insatiable appetites. The food looked delicious. The various colors of the many sweets spread across the street seemed to reflect the happiness around them. The sun reflecting off the various glass ornaments filled the street with bursts of color. The street was exploding with life and excitement. Children ran wild, chasing after balloons and yearning for their chance to be lifted into the air by the massive giant wheel. Although, many people tried to contain their excitement and anticipation for the beautiful day that they were experiencing, they seldom succeeded. The multitudes of street vendors roared offers, trying to speak above each other to attract their customers. Every roar was filled with compassion, and every sale, regardless of whose it was, was met with pride and smiles from one and all. The bangles on their racks glistened with fresh rain drops and clattered in harmony as women and girls tried them on.
And as the sun began its slow decent beneath the horizon the crowds began to disperse, leaving behind memories of a day that would live on in their hearts forever. The street still buzzed with echoes of excited chatter and the appetizing smell of food still remained long after the people had left. As I got up to bolt my window shut, I pondered over what new adventure tomorrow had in store for me.
The rain fell in strong, heavy droplets and the sun hid behind the black clouds like a coward. The street below me was once again filled with people, just like it always is. Although the downpour soon came to an end all it brought was humid, hot weather. As people talked away incessantly their tones were angry and upset. They sounded as if life was not worth living, the everyday pains and troubles not worth enduring. Their dark clothes clung tightly to their skin as a result of the disastrous climate.
The smell of food floated up to my balcony and I coiled in revulsion. The food below was oily, greasy and unhygienic enough to kill the people below, yet they ate away not bothering about their lives. The colorful sweets were stale and covered with the white of decay. As parents complained and moaned about the horrible weather, the children ran wild. They cried and shrieked their protests when they learned that they were not to ride the giant wheel. The various glass ornaments lying around the vendors’ shops were chipped, scattering light in all directions and into the eyes of annoyed passersby. The ever present smiles of the people on the street below me were filled with malice and dripping with greed. To them the world was nothing more than a giant market where nothing was immoral in the pursuit of money and their own shallow happiness.
The street vendors bellowed above each other, trying to be heard. They were disheartened and discontented with their meaningless lives in one of a million bazaars in the city. Their eyes and heart were consumed with jealously at the success of a fellow vendor. Their beady eyes combed the people lined street looking for an innocent pedestrian to fall prey to their commercial trap. The bangles on the racks clanged and created loud and annoying sounds. As women and girls alike tried them on the one thought that consumed their minds was “can I possibly afford this?”
As the sun began its lazy fall behind the horizon the road emptied. It was void of any good memories and all that lingered in the air was the hatred that had floated around like the stink of the stale food. The vendors packed their belongings and counted their meager earnings for the day. They returned to their lives of compromise and nothingness and thought about another day in their own personal hell. And once the road was clear of all living beings, I got off my ledge, bolted my window shut, and thought of the true shallowness of monotony of everyday life that consumes us, and that will eventually destroy us all.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Just another fascination. this too shall pass
The little boy stared at the fish all day long. It swam around in circles. Circle after circle...obstacle-free. It never got bored and neither did he. He walked about in circles mimicking it’s motion and ended up in the same spot staring back at the blue red fighter fish. So tantalising, oh so beautiful yet deadly all at once. He looked up at the shop keeper once again and asked “how much?”.
And once again, his father looked at him and said “you can’t have the fish. Now let’s go!”
And the little boy walked after his father sadly, turning back every few seconds till the fish was out of sight. He sat at night and thought about it’s flawless motion: so smooth, so free and yet so trapped. In a bubble of it’s own, the fish was where he wanted to be. The fish was what he wanted to be... oblivious to all...
Time and again, he passed the shop with his eyes glued to the fighter fish. He watched it’s fins swiftly move and it’s scales shine in the sun. And suddenly, it happened.
He looked up at his dad and rubbed his eyes, “what did you say,dad?”
His father smiled and said, “You heard me,kid. Go on then. Go buy it.”
And with a glow in his tummy, a grin on his face and an unforgettable twinkle in his big brown eyes, he walked through the door and demanded to have the fighter fish.
“I WANT THAT ONE. RIGHT THERE!" , he pointed as he widened his eyes in excitement and stared through his long eye lashes.
He carried the fish bowl home and watched it swim about, round in circles, swiftly, impeccably, and he let the movement and sound serenade him. It just went round and round and most fascinatingly, it made him an unbelievably “boodifool” bubble nest! He brought his friends over and screamed “ISN’T IT SO COOL?!”
Day after day, he spent hours watching it..and it fascinated his little human heart, until it didn’t anymore.
The days went by and the fish swam about in it’s circles unnoticed, sometimes even unfed. It was as magnanimous as ever, and the bubble nests got bigger. It looked through the glass at the oblivious boy and swam about...
And the little boy forgot. The tiny as ever fish stared out at the boy whilst hitting the sides of the fish bowl. And the little boy stood oblivious as ever .
Oh, how tables turn.
And once again, his father looked at him and said “you can’t have the fish. Now let’s go!”
And the little boy walked after his father sadly, turning back every few seconds till the fish was out of sight. He sat at night and thought about it’s flawless motion: so smooth, so free and yet so trapped. In a bubble of it’s own, the fish was where he wanted to be. The fish was what he wanted to be... oblivious to all...
Time and again, he passed the shop with his eyes glued to the fighter fish. He watched it’s fins swiftly move and it’s scales shine in the sun. And suddenly, it happened.
He looked up at his dad and rubbed his eyes, “what did you say,dad?”
His father smiled and said, “You heard me,kid. Go on then. Go buy it.”
And with a glow in his tummy, a grin on his face and an unforgettable twinkle in his big brown eyes, he walked through the door and demanded to have the fighter fish.
“I WANT THAT ONE. RIGHT THERE!" , he pointed as he widened his eyes in excitement and stared through his long eye lashes.
He carried the fish bowl home and watched it swim about, round in circles, swiftly, impeccably, and he let the movement and sound serenade him. It just went round and round and most fascinatingly, it made him an unbelievably “boodifool” bubble nest! He brought his friends over and screamed “ISN’T IT SO COOL?!”
Day after day, he spent hours watching it..and it fascinated his little human heart, until it didn’t anymore.
The days went by and the fish swam about in it’s circles unnoticed, sometimes even unfed. It was as magnanimous as ever, and the bubble nests got bigger. It looked through the glass at the oblivious boy and swam about...
And the little boy forgot. The tiny as ever fish stared out at the boy whilst hitting the sides of the fish bowl. And the little boy stood oblivious as ever .
Oh, how tables turn.
Valentines Day - Isn't Fighting the cliche a cliche in itself ?
"Valentines Day is a day invented for Hallmark to make money"
"Valentines Day is socially retarded and a conformist holiday"
"Valentines Day is the worst day of the year"
Oh, and my all time favorite...
"Valentines Day is a Cliche"
Well, here's news for all of you... The new cliche is Anti-Valentines Day... The new cliche is fighting the day during which a long time ago a man stood up for love and literally died for it.
Does that really make any sense to you ?
Cos it sure as hell doesn't make sense to me.
So maybe the commercialists decided to make money off of it. But don't they always ? that's why it's called business, right ?
If we were to socially reprimand every holiday that society celebrates to make another feel special, we'd condemn Birthdays, Christmas, New years and pretty much every other holiday. Then we wouldn't even HAVE holidays. and that would SUCK , wouldn't it ?
So here's a piece of advice...
Instead of moping around at home or grimacing at roses or refusing to acknowledge the day, just buy someone a rose... because even if it's the most common day of the year, I assure you ... it'll still put a smile on their face...
You say Why ?
I say...
Why not ?
"Valentines Day is socially retarded and a conformist holiday"
"Valentines Day is the worst day of the year"
Oh, and my all time favorite...
"Valentines Day is a Cliche"
Well, here's news for all of you... The new cliche is Anti-Valentines Day... The new cliche is fighting the day during which a long time ago a man stood up for love and literally died for it.
Does that really make any sense to you ?
Cos it sure as hell doesn't make sense to me.
So maybe the commercialists decided to make money off of it. But don't they always ? that's why it's called business, right ?
If we were to socially reprimand every holiday that society celebrates to make another feel special, we'd condemn Birthdays, Christmas, New years and pretty much every other holiday. Then we wouldn't even HAVE holidays. and that would SUCK , wouldn't it ?
So here's a piece of advice...
Instead of moping around at home or grimacing at roses or refusing to acknowledge the day, just buy someone a rose... because even if it's the most common day of the year, I assure you ... it'll still put a smile on their face...
You say Why ?
I say...
Why not ?
Monday, February 8, 2010
Things I lost in the fire...
The raging fire stared me in the face and I stared back oh so daringly. It flared up showing off it’s grandoise colors… The red and orange screaming caution and a tinge of yellow amidst it all… And yet I stared back into it walking closer against my better judgement…
The flames danced up and down and crackled a melody,torched a design and sparked my inspiration for in the face of the trembling fear, I felt inspired.
My feet shuffled about as the adrenaline dripped through my veins and my eyes stayed fixated on the red,the orange,the tinge of yellow…I fell at it’s mercy and sat on my knees watching the dancing danger and hence my inspiration was spurred further…
My mind screamed out to me and yet I crawled towards the fire… The rusty orange sharp edges of the flames warned me to stop as they projected a fiery red… STOP…
And yet my body dragged me forward with some kind of magnetic attraction to the heat… Oh,dangerous inspiration...So inexplicable..& I...I screamed in pain as the heat burned everything…
My integrity, my fear, my peace, my numbness, my feelings, my trust, my humanity, my face , my body and more.
These are the things…intangible things I lost in the fire.
The flames danced up and down and crackled a melody,torched a design and sparked my inspiration for in the face of the trembling fear, I felt inspired.
My feet shuffled about as the adrenaline dripped through my veins and my eyes stayed fixated on the red,the orange,the tinge of yellow…I fell at it’s mercy and sat on my knees watching the dancing danger and hence my inspiration was spurred further…
My mind screamed out to me and yet I crawled towards the fire… The rusty orange sharp edges of the flames warned me to stop as they projected a fiery red… STOP…
And yet my body dragged me forward with some kind of magnetic attraction to the heat… Oh,dangerous inspiration...So inexplicable..& I...I screamed in pain as the heat burned everything…
My integrity, my fear, my peace, my numbness, my feelings, my trust, my humanity, my face , my body and more.
These are the things…intangible things I lost in the fire.
Monday, January 25, 2010
Impressions
You only see,
What I allow,
First impressions,
Disavow.
The mask is worn,
For quite some time,
A hill of trust,
One must climb.
Acquaintance,
Friend's a title earned,
You learn to shy,
When you've been burned.
Eyes may see,
But they don't hear,
The subtle tests,
Laid out in fear.
Proven,
Your intentions true,
Impressions left,
And now subdue.
What I allow,
First impressions,
Disavow.
The mask is worn,
For quite some time,
A hill of trust,
One must climb.
Acquaintance,
Friend's a title earned,
You learn to shy,
When you've been burned.
Eyes may see,
But they don't hear,
The subtle tests,
Laid out in fear.
Proven,
Your intentions true,
Impressions left,
And now subdue.
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